My heart was born to love; designed to love; has been conditioned to love.
It was never prepared to love.
For most of us building relationships is a frustrating reality of having all the tools, the materials and instructions laid out before us yet we're illiterate and all the teachers are on strike.
Now, you can teach yourself to read enough to get by but deep inside you know you aren't your best teacher.
So you'll carry your secret in your heart and pretend you're keeping up when around those who read fluently.
The problem is you don't know half the words and less of their meaning.
You'll keep going until you're found out.
Your choices are to live with the shame, a lie of denial or retaliate against the value of reading. You'll go into protect mode by questioning the purpose or need for reading when you've gotten by just fine with your limited knowledge.
Meanwhile your tools, materials and instructions are still scattered on the ground and your relationship condo looks more like a shanty.
It would be funny if it weren't so close to truth.
I've found a teacher to drag me from the grips of illiteracy and I'm more prepared now to build that love condo than I've felt I've ever been.
My teacher has never been on strike all I ever had to do was ask for assistance.
If you can remember the first moments of learning to read (sommayall gotta think waaaaaay back😅) it happens in a single moment with that first word "ca ca ca ah ah ah tah tah cuuaatuh caahaatuh taaa🤔 caaatah? CAT!🙋🏽"
It's a puzzling solution and every first word is a struggle but when you've strung together that first sentence you have plucked the fruit from the tree of knowledge and you can begin to clearly see this naked world.
Learning to be a loving, spiritually grounded person is a lot like learning to read. A puzzling solution which is easily adaptable once you learn the a b c's of a loving God.
The trick in becoming a scholar is continually practicing application of the word.
It feels remarkable to finally be prepared.